2-17-14

I woke up 8:30 on a day im supposed to have break in order to have a Rapid Palatal Expander put in. I've had it for maybe 5 hours and I'm already crying from how frustrating this thing is. I can't speak, I can't swallow, I can't eat, I can't drink, I can't do ANYTHING with my mouth and it's making me cry. I'm hungry and thirsty and I have to have this torture device for 4 months. I want to rip it out of my mouth. This entire month has just been shitty, and I can tell it's just gonna get shittier.

2-7-14

Right now I want to be anywhere than where I am. I want to be in my secret spot, or in the woods, or Atlanta, ANYWHERE than home and school right now. Preferably, I want to be in Columbus, where a ton of my friends are for Thespian Conference. I'm a thespian, I should be there. But god forbid I get to go this year. This was my only and last year to go with my friend from guard and I didn't get to be there with her to share inside jokes and laugh and share memories with. Like I physically ache from the pure want of wanting to be there. Theatre has quickly became my whole life, with tech crew and auditions, it quickly took over my life and I love it. I love it all, the one acts, the full acts, Shakespeare, modern, costume design, stage lights, directing, stage manager, you name it I love it. Columbus is the one place I truly with all my heart want to be. And I can't, and it's killing me.

Overall this has been an extremely shitty week. I'm failing classes, I can't keep my head on straight, my teeth hurt from braces, this entire week has sucked major balls, and I'm ready to have my friends back so I can talk to people again.